One More Thing
When I think about my day-to-day life with Multiple Sclerosis, there is one phrase that I think comes to mind constantly: “One more thing” (often times, that sentiment is preceded by an “ugh”). It’s a phrase that seems to perfectly sum up the frustration that my disease constantly springs upon me. Whether it is having to add a new medication, or having a new symptom, or just any MS-related problem that comes along, it always feels like it’s already adding to a mountain of other things. One more straw to see if the camel’s back will finally break (and there are many moments when I feel certain it will).
There’s always something else
“One more thing” is a phrase that relates to nearly every aspect of my disease. Talking with the doctor and ready to try a new medication? Great, just one more thing to try. Having a rough day already where you’re fatigued and can barely walk, then dropping a glass, shattering it and spilling the contents? Yep, one more thing to add to the day’s disasters. Experiencing a new symptom, like blurry vision, for the first time after years of living with the disease? Yep, one more way MS is affecting you (reminder: new symptoms should always be told to your doctor).
When non-MS problems add to the frustration
Non-MS problems also add one more thing to the pile. Already struggling with the daily tribulations of life with MS? OK, your wife is leaving you. Already accounting for every minute of your day because of your disease? Well, time to get your taxes done. Living paycheck to paycheck on disability? OK, you now owe tax money. The lawn won’t cut itself? OK, one more thing to get done, somehow. Sometimes, it’s the non-MS problems that really make me want to crumble. Don’t I already deal with enough? Isn’t MS hard enough on its own?
I’m sure life for people without MS can feel like there is always “one more thing”. One more problem, one more expense, one more thing to do. The thing is, we have that on top of all of the ways our disease can add to the pile. Add MS to the equation of life and I feel like every day I wake up just to get kicked in the… um, let’s just say “male region”. Life can seem like an onslaught of one frustration after another that never stops. It’s like kick after kick to that “male region,” and you wonder when it’s going to give. How can we possibly keep going with one thing after another with no end in sight?
Trying to look for the good
Sometimes there isn’t a great answer. No matter what I do, I still often feel like there is always one more thing trying to bring me down. It gets to the point where I simply have to laugh at it. You hit so much misfortune and I think it’s natural to think, “Really? This, too? No way.” and laugh. Maybe that’s actually the sign that the camel’s back has finally broken. Throughout the frustrations and problems, I try to enjoy the simpler things much more than I once did. A cool breeze, a tasty beer, the comfort of my dog laying next to me, etc. I try to stop and think that there is an endless parade of good things that happen to me, too, they just aren’t as noticeable. I think you really have to be mindful and condition yourself to look for those good things. Even with them though, I admit, I can still feel like there’s always one more thing! When you get overwhelmed by all of this additional issues in life, try to pause and remember the little things, the good things, and remember you aren’t alone. I’m somewhere, probably muttering “ugh, one more thing”, just as you are, so hang in there!
The holiday season is among us and can be so stressful! Do you experience more flares during this season?