Skip to Accessibility Tools Skip to Content Skip to Footer

Pains of Being a Female

So let me start this out by saying, this is a post for the ladies that have MS… So you have been forewarned. It’s not ‘ew-gross’ or anything, just something for the ladies to relate to.

Now, let me just share on how this all came about, so you can get an idea of where my mind set was coming from, and why I’m writing this now. My best friend has MS, so just a heads up. We always share how we’re feeling, because in some strange way, we seem to go through the same thing at the same time. She is in Canada and I’m in Texas, so it’s not likely we have the same environment around us, etc.

But yesterday was a Sunday, and my husband and kids wanted to go over to a friend’s house to hang out for a bit. So I was like all right, let me get ready. As I go in my room to get ‘ready’… I’m thinking to myself, it’s kinda chilly outside, I should wear a sweatshirt/hoodie. Mind you, if it’s in the low-70’s are below, that’s considered cold for me, don’t judge. So as I was getting my hoodie, I thought to myself, “Crap, we’re going somewhere, that means I have to put a bra on.” Then a light bulb went off, and it’s like HEY! I am wearing a hoodie over my shirt, I don’t HAVE to wear a bra, if I really don’t want to. Is that weird? Oh well, I don’t care.

This isn’t me just NOT wanting to wear a bra, as a form of rebellion or just being lazy. The reason is because if I wear constricting things, it causes spasms/tightness and the horrible MS Hug. So I avoid wearing constricting material, like a bra, because of that… especially for a long period of time. Let me also say that the house we were going to, was out in the middle of nowhere, so no biggie.

I guess my secret is now out on why I love cooler weather… lol Well, I mean kinda obvious that I don’t like the EXTREME Texas Heat that we have during the summer for obvious reasons, but you get my drift.

Once I get home from work, one of the first things I do is take off my bra. If you have dealt with what I’m explaining, then you known that this is not an exaggeration. I repeat, THIS IS NOT AN EXAGGERATION. I have a very high pain tolerance, or so I’ve been told, and the MS Hug can me make immobile and almost in tears at times, same as muscle tightness/spasms. This is not your normal spasm either. It feels like my muscles are screaming at me, asking me why I am mistreating them! Am I making any sense right now? Am I the only one that deals with this? Well besides my bestie… but that doesn’t’ count.

Let me explain to you that because of all the stress I put on my back/shoulders, I ended up being referred to a pain specialist, and had to have a nerve block done on my shoulder area, to have some sort of pain relief. It’s obviously just a temporary relief, not permanent, but at least I get some sort of relief.

So basically, the topic of this article, is about the pains of being a female… we’ve all heard about it before, but can you imagine the ‘pains of being a female’ and having MS on top of that… Wearing cute clothes, having to wear dresses, which means heels… That’s just not something I can do. And it’s not just because of the fact that I literally don’t own a dress or heels, it’s because I will fall on my face if I attempt to walk in heels. Face meet floor, end of story, if I wear heels.

Most of my wardrobe is jeans, t-shirts, shorts, flip-flops and tennis shoes, and boots. Of course it’s easier just to throw those things on, then get dressed up, but it is also because I literally can’t deal with the ‘pains’ of wearing heels, having my hair and make-up done on point all the time, etc. This list could go on and on and on, not even joking.

Why do I wear jeans/yoga pants a lot? Their comfy, that’s for sure… but also, it’s not easy to shave my legs. My hand doesn’t like to steadily hold a razor for that long, all the time. Is that TMI? Well, sorry, it’s the truth. I know that men have their own issues that they have to deal with, and I’m not saying female issues are more of pain, or anything like that. I’m just sharing some of the struggles that I have to live with everyday. This isn’t even all of them, this is barely even touching on all the topics that can be covered, but I’m gonna stop here, because it’s been a long day and I just need some rest time.

Until next time!


Ashley Ringstaff

Follow me on Facebook | Follow me on Twitter | Follow me on Pinterest

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.


  • Joelle Buck
    4 years ago

    I’m right there with you girl! Thanks for sharing…it is reaffirming to know ” we are not alone” ✌

  • Mascha
    4 years ago

    I get you!!!lol!
    My first attack was apparently the MS hug. I found out last week by my new neurologist. I was on the sofa for 8 months. Could not weir tight clothes and sat bend over behind my wheel driving to pick up my boys.
    Untill my neighbor/friend gave me valium. She saved me from another 8 months on the sofa!!!
    I hate bra’s!!! I throw them off as soon as i am home!!! But since late my breast have become fuller and there goes that T- shirt with no bra!!
    Living in Monaco is all dress,heels etc.
    Last week i was so tired i went outside with no make up,trackies and runners. At the hairsalon the guy that knows me for years,looked suprised.
    The whole weekend fatigue and today but managed to dress somewhat better and make up. His manner was completely different and even said much better. I hate Monaco! I can’t wear my heels,only platforms to a certain hight at night and sometimes days. But those days are getting less and less.i love wearing woman tgings and dresses but my MS is sort of stopping me. I hear the trend is dresses and runners …not sure about this.
    Showering is exhausting with blow dry each day as i am a hairdresser freak!
    I totally get you lol!!!!!

  • Mascha
    4 years ago

    Oh and spasticity drives me insane!!!!

  • Poll