No Sympathy for You

That title sounds really rude, doesn’t it? Oh well, I’m a blunt person and don’t really have a ‘filter’ when it comes to speaking my mind but I’m sure most of you are used to this.

For the record, this article title has NOTHING to do about those with MS or any other chronic illness, I just wanted to get that out there in the beginning, so that there wasn’t any confusion and so people didn’t get mad at me without knowing what I’m actually meaning…

So what do I mean? Well, I’m not sure if everyone has experienced this or gets as aggravated as I do at times… but I’m talking about the people who complain about the most ‘common’ things and want attention about it.

So for instance, I had a conversation with someone I had met very recently… and it was a well-known thing that I have MS. She had even asked me about it, because I was wearing a t-shirt about it. Anyways, she had confirmed that I do in fact have MS, she like started spilling her story to me about her ‘pain’, etc. Okay, I can understand that.

However, my response was “Yeah, that sucks.” Because I mean I just met the girl, I don’t know her all that well… what am I supposed to say? Did she feel like since I have MS that she felt like we ‘related’ on the pain subject? I have no idea… but it was the most annoying thing to me at the time. Like why does this person want my sympathy? It’s not like she doesn’t get it from her family and friends from what she said, but it was like she was trying to make it seem like her pain and my pain, or someone with MS, are one in the same. And that’s a big fat NEGATIVE.

I’m not at all trying to be rude by this either, just so you know. But sometimes I’m just thinking to myself when I encounter someone like I just described in different scenarios, I’m just thinking… “Cry Me A River.” Is that mean, yes it kind of is, but it’s not like I can stop my head from thinking the comment.

I can totally understand when someone is hurt, and the pain they go through. It’s not fun at all. But you know those people who over exaggerate the issue. I mean, they just have like this ‘sign’ that tells me they are over exaggerating more for attention that for anything else. Like, who do you think you are?

There are people, like myself, who have to deal with constant pain and horrible symptoms on a daily basis, for whatever the reason behind it… and then we have people out there that are trying to make things up to be “one of us”. This is not the kind of crowd you want to belong to honey.

Even when someone says that they have a horrible headache and feel like crap, maybe they have the cold or flu or something… “I’m sorry, I hope you feel better soon.” But I’m not going to act as if you’re fragile. I for one dealt with feeling like that on a constant basis when I was on an Interferon, which I’m sure many of you can relate to.

Is it just me that sits here and thinks, “What’s the big friggin’ deal?!” Maybe it is, I don’t know… but I just had to get this out there. I don’t wish what I go through onto my worst enemy and then there are people out there trying to gain attention and pity over their temporary state?

Sorry if I’m not going to cater to that one sweetie… but when I’ve become accustomed to the pain and all the other symptoms I deal with, I really don’t have a high tolerance for the people who complain about the most trivial things ever.

“Why?” Well that’s easy for me to answer. Because the people who are complaining about their temporary pain, sickness, etc. to a point of “okay shut up already”… it’s like a slap in the face. “Why?” Because those with MS, like myself and many others with illnesses that have no cure… we don’t ‘get over’ the symptoms and go on about our happy way. We deal with this in every day life… 24 hours a day, 7 days a week all year long.

So… No, I don’t have any sympathy for the people who try and use their pain and/or being sick to get attention. It’s unbelievable that people actually do this, but sadly they do. Get up, put on your big girl/boy pants, and get over yourself.

Yes, I live with my MS symptoms on a daily basis; do I want attention because of it? NO! Do I want special treatment? NO! I want to live my life the best way I can. I don’t want my MS to be the topic of conversation all the time. I don’t want people to put me into a category of “the MS girl” (in a bad way). I don’t mind being “the MS girl” – if it’s referring to how I fight against MS, how I take part in the MS community and how I’m not just laying down and giving up. I’m living my life the way I want to.

Life is unpredictable. Life isn’t always fair. But we have to deal with it, and keep LIVING.

Anyways, this is for all the people who try and ‘gain’ something by disrespecting those who actually live with the things they are just making up or over exaggerating for attention. You will not receive my pity and or sympathy for how you’re ‘feeling’… But you will receive some sort of pity for your behavior.

Now that I have that off my chest – I hope I’m not alone on how I feel, because I will feel like a really mean and shallow person and that’s not how I want to be portrayed. So know that by reading this, it isn’t to offend anyone who is actually experiencing the things they complain about.

xoxo

Ashley Ringstaff

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This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The MultipleSclerosis.net team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

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