I don’t actually LIVE alone, I have a husband and 2 young kids. But I am VERY alone in my MS fight. My husband travels for a living and he is not home for 3 or 4 days each week so the kids (ages 6 1/2 and 4) are totally my responsibility. My Dad has Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s and my Mom is busy taking care of him full time. My Mother-in-law passed away in October and my Father-in-law passed away 8 years ago. I have 1 sister who works full time and never married – she tries to help my parents out as much as she can and so do I – my Mom really needs the support. My brother-in-law and his wife have their own challenges and my husband was never close to his brother so we just so rarely see them – they have 2 special needs kids that they adopted about 5 years ago so they have enough trouble. My husband’s only other sibling is a sister who never married and works full time and she’s also about 12 years older than I am and having many health problems. She needs support more than I do because she is also technologically challenged. She doesn’t even own a computer so she needs help as executor of her Mom’s estate and I’m the designated person to help her because I am at home on disability while everyone else is working full time and in seriously stressful jobs. I don’t know a single other person with MS that I can talk to. The 2 people I used to know that had MS have already passed away. One of them died before I even found out she had MS. I know of 1 other person from the neighborhood I grew up in that has MS but she’s about 30 years older than me and kind of a recluse. I found out she had MS through the neighborhood grapevine but I don’t think I’ve ever actually had a conversation with her and I’ve known of her my entire life. I rely on forums and my doctor (who is awesome) but I don’t have anyone in my life who really understands and offers any practical support. My husband is in mourning because I’m such a different person than I was when we got married so MS has had a much more negative impact on him than on me, frankly. He doesn’t really get it and I can’t talk to him about my struggles because it just bums him out too much. I have almost no babysitting support so I had to take my 4 year old son with me to my eye exam (the one you are supposed to have 3 months after starting on Gilenya) which I wasn’t even able to get on my schedule until I was 5 months post starting Gilenya. Thankfully, nothing is wrong with my eyes so I got a good report. I wanted to get my hair permed 2 years ago so I started growing it out because I want a spiral perm. But I can’t find a day when I can afford the 2 or 3 hour appointment – I just don’t have the babysitting support. My husband isn’t cut out to babysit – just can’t deal with the kids on his own and our kids are super active so I just can’t ask anyone to spend 3 hours trying to entertain my kids while I get an unnecessary perm. I AM really alone in my struggles. There was just an article on an ms forum that said “You are not alone!” And it went on to say that the MS community is fighting the fight along side me. But I need practical support that just isn’t available to me. I’m not depressed, I keep plugging away. But I AM alone.