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49 and recently diagnosed

It's my first day on here reading so I definitely don't feel alone at this point however I'm so overwhelmed and can't stop the tears to the point that is driving me insane. Right now I'm just hoping and praying that part of it doesn't last too much longer. And if it does just don't tell me I'll just stay oblivious for now b x😜. I actually always knew stuff like this was going to be possible I had my first hip surgery as a baby, broke my back while still in high school right after getting diagnosed with scoliosis. Couple of other small injuries and then at 33 I broke C5 and C6 with minimum damage.
I am trying to get the breathing under control so that my anxiety will calm down due to already have an asthma with allergies and South Georgia heat it all fights against each other with the anxiety. The first couple of dollar trips was due to me falling for no reason although I had been shaking for years after breaking my neck. But when my symptoms start they came out of nowhere and I feel like every one of them have hit me fast. Although I'm not scared about living or dying either or I just don't want my family to have to EVER "wipe me". As crazy as it sounds that is my biggest fear right now and I think it seems from being physically hurt as a teenager. I have sons and daughter-in-laws and a couple of grandbabies both of my parents are still alive so I definitely have support but my brain just can't even comprehend that right now.
Thanks in advance for any kind words or not so kind ones as long as it's the truth and I may need to hear it. I don't know any of you but I love you already as a family because I've already connecting so thank you and God bless!

  1. Hi and welcome, ! I am glad you took the time to share a part of your story with the community. First off, being newly diagnosed can be a such a crazy overwhelming time for a person! And, whatever feelings you are feeling -- that's normal. Whether you feel sad or angry or confused or numb or whatever. You get to feel however you need to feel with this new diagnosis. And, ouch! It sounds like you have dealt with more than your fair share of spinal and skeletal issues! So, you're obviously no stranger to high levels of pain. I wanted to share this piece with tips for the newly diagnosed that I thought you might find interesting --

    Do you have a neurologist working on potential treatment plans with you? Having a trusted doctor to support you and guide you through this transition can be very helpful.

    Also, I don't think your fears are silly at all. We all have something that really makes us feel dependent on others and those fears matter. It's okay to listen to them, acknowledge them, and then try (I said try, I'm not great at this step) to let them go. Finding communities with people that get it (like this one and others) can help with some of those fears a questions.

    You sound like one tough cookie, Ruby! You can do this!

    Best, Erin, Team Member.

    P.S. I hope you hang in there through that Georgia weather! Southern summers do not mess around!

    1. morning. Across a barrier this weekend and was able to talk to my parents and kids face to face about the diagnosis so at least that part's out. And even though I feel more peaceful right now it breaks my heart no one they're hurting because they love me. They all agreed and assured me I'm not alone they understood my fears but they got my back. Of course one of my sons is a jokester and I told him my concerns as far as he was concerned it's cuz his crazy but would probably put a firecracker in my butt because I was mean to him when I didn't mean to be lol. Laughing is always been our best medicine and this is the kid that blew back hold it up play on the firecrackers in the house so at least family can make you laugh no matter what you face together. My poor youngest son was broken hearted he just had a new baby and he actually caused one of my concussions as a five-year-old when he opened the freezer and I stood up too fast. So I told him in those moments whatever I might say or do just remember he had a touch to do with it so just laugh through it and no mama still loves him. thank you so much for the encouragement I have no idea what's about to happen but step by step is all we can do

    2. , I am so glad the conversations went well, even if they weren't easy! I am so touched that your family was so loving ang supportive. As someone that comes from a family that also uses humor and laughter to cope, I can totally understand your comment to your youngest son! Sometimes, laughing is all we can do in a given moment. You've got this! Step by step, just like you wrote.

      Best, Erin, Team Member.

  2. Awww. Thanks for making me smile this morning. I haven't started treatment because I have to decide if I'm staying in n ga or heading home to family. (I have zero support where I moved to for work so alone doesn't touch it. I'm so numb!!!!

    1. thanks for your words. I was able to make the drive to see my kids and my parents face to face this weekend. Of course it was hard but it was also peaceful.

    2. I am glad you got that opportunity to tell them face-to-face, . We have lots of articles here that are written to help friends and family understand your treatments, your emotional state and the overall impact of MS. Please feel free to share whenever you find yourself at a loss for effective words or in need of an outside perspective. We are here for you whenever you need us. - Lori (Team Member)

  3. I bet face to face with my parents and my children this weekend so that they at least know. Now at least they're aware of the decisions and the pain and all of that so it has give me peace about some things and we laughed about things at the same time I know now they're going to be hurting with me so of course that adds to the broken heart. Thanks for your words and I hope you have a great day

    1. Hi , so sorry to hear what you've been going through. It's a stressful and a scary time. I must admit, your fears of our family having to "wipe" you hit home for me. I was diagnosed in my early 20s but grew up caring for a grandfaher who had MS, so I at times had to wipe him. One of my earliest exacerbations left my arms numb and difficult to use and I need my family to do just that with me. That was tough and really hit on those fears. I recovered from that exacerbation and I havent needed that kind of help since. It's a fear that still lingers in the back of my mind though. The idea of my family or anyone having to take care of me absolutely terrifies me. The very last thing I want is to be a burden. So I understand how you feel all too well.

      All of that said, there are reasons to not be too worried about all that. While it's never good to be diagnosed with MS, in the history of the disease, this is the best time to get it, There have been many advances in treatment with many more on the way. We have treatments now that are so much more effective than what I had when I did need help in the bathroom and treatments that are light years better than what my grandfather had. Of course anything can happen and the disease can be very different from person to person, but right now we have treatment options that can mean we dont have to have that fear as much as we once did. The future for those that get diagnosed these days is, on average anyway, very very bright. Even knowing that, I know it can be hard to not have those fears though, so please remember you aren't alone with those concerns.

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