My children are now in their 30s. It wasn't until they were in their early 20s that my wife descended from remitting relapsing MS into the secondary progressive stage of MS, and lost most of her ability to be an independent person. I assumed all of the responsibility for taking care of her and I've made a conscious effort not to let my wife's MS suck the joy and freedom out of their lives. They are loving sons, but they are not involved in caring for my wife. I haven't asked them to get involved and they haven't volunteered. I don't fault them for that.
I'd like to hear about the experience others have had with regard to adult children's involvement in the care of a parent with MS, and how it has affected their lives.