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I used to think about doing things

I have lived with MS since October 19, 1986. I was 20. I'm 57 years old now and I still sometimes ask myself,," why me"? I don't like this disease but I'm not always angry at it. I have gone through so many ups and downs that I know I am stronger than I think I am. Physically and mentally but also I'm not as afraid to say to my family that I can't do that today. I had to learn how to ask for help when I need it. I've also learned that no one can tell me to get over it and get out of my head. When it hurts. And not always with a specific reason.
Lately I have started having some trouble sleeping. So I might be awake for days. Then when I do finally go to sleep. I sleep for days.
I often think if only I had a magic wand. But I have had MS for so long that I don't know how I would feel if I didn't have it. This is a normal life to me. I had someone ask me. How do you live with it? I
had the best answer ever. I asked her how she lived without it? We just looked at each other and went out separate ways.
I stopped by here to say that I'm so grateful for finding other people that have MS and know what I mean when I say that I don't know when it started or how long I've felt like this.
Keep smiling and always know that you are not alone anymore.
Have a great weekend!!!

  1. thank you for bringing the sunshine with your message. While I'm sorry to hear that you've been living with MS for so many years (you're a true warrior!), I'm glad to hear that being part of this community has been helpful. I'm sure it was rather lonely when you were first diagnosed, so your story is a true testament to the resilience that you've developed over the years. You've also become a great advocate for yourself in setting clear boundaries when you can't do something with the family. I'm sure it's disappointing to decline an invitation, but you're doing an great thing by honoring your body's needs in that moment. Again, thanks for sharing your experience and being part of this community.
    Alene, moderator

    1. Thank you Arlene for your kind words. I have come to understand that people without MS truly don't get how we feel. I'm so glad that this community is here and what I've been looking for to help me continue to not give into this disease.

      1. I'm so glad that you're finding this community and the words shared here to be helpful in managing the day-to-day life with MS. Coming together in community for this is so helpful. We just get it. Thank YOU for being part of this community and conversation too!
        Alene, Moderator

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