At Home With MS
"...Can't do is like don't care meaning neither one of them have a home…"
– Maya Angelou, I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings
Home is your happy place
What is the commonality between how one might feel after a hard or an exceptionally long day at work? Vacationing - no matter how long it may or may not have been? Or a day of running errands or handling business? How about having to spend even a night in the hospital? The commonality between how one might feel is settled/relieved - to finally be back in the sanctity, the comfort of their home. Exclamations upon arriving home may be "Yesss.. home sweet home!" or "Ahhh.. it's so good to finally be home!" And why? Because home is more than just a place that keeps the rain off of your head... It's your happy place.
Home is where peace and security await
Home is where your peace awaits you. Home is a place that just feels good, feels right. Home provides security, identity, and, among other things, an escape from the outside world and influences - if you let it. Just as you're selective about who dwells in your home, your space, you also should be concerned about what forces - specifically negativity, self-doubt, despair, pessimism or anything of the like - are let in. They threaten what our homes serve for us.
Being careful who we let in
Negative emotions usher in those 'can't do's' and 'don't care' attitudes - neither of which are healthy to live in our homes - or our state of minds. For me, it's multiple sclerosis (MS)... for others, it may be other unfortunate circumstances or situations that have taken residence - albeit uninvited - but we musn't allow negativity and it's baggage to make themselves at home.
'Housekeeping' chores for a peaceful home
Being negative won't get you anywhere and the more negative you are, the worse you end up feeling - so I'm going to share several of my 'housekeeping' chores that keep my home my sanctity.. my state of mind peaceful.
Focusing on the present
I focus not on what used to be (full use of fine and gross motor skills, etc.) or fear what may come (total incapacity), but rather remind myself that the only thing I have control over is the present (to appreciate the abilities I still have at this juncture).
Shifting negative thoughts into positive ones
Saying positive things to myself (I am doing the best I can and doing great!) over and over helps to shift negative thinking to positive. I try to avoid the "yes, but" mentality when it comes to trying new things and I stay cognizant that "in every challenge there's a gift, and in every gift there's a challenge".
Saying YES to life
Most importantly, I say YES to life (MS is difficult to live with in many ways BUT it will NOT provoke me in taking ANY of my silver liners for granted). Staying positive isn't always easy, but it keeps my home inhabitable.
Make yours a happy home
The last part of the aforementioned aphorism from Ms. Angelou's book translates the 'can't do and don't care not having a home' as "...that meant there was nothing a person can't do and there should be nothing a human being didn't care about." Care about yourself enough to do the best you can with what you have - through whatever your woes might be - and make yours a happy home in which to dwell.
And as I often tell those who are going through, be encouraged!
How well do people around you understand MS?