Am I a Warrior?

I have recently begun to question the description of those living with multiple sclerosis as warriors. This is not a new discussion in the community. It is a new discussion as it applies to me. Am I a warrior?

I have a chronic disease that I am actively trying to fight and I have compared that effort to being in battle. I have called myself a warrior on paper, but never really felt that I fit comfortably into that suit. How did having MS turn me into some form of a brave, courageous soldier engaged in warfare?

What makes an MS warrior?

Calling me a warrior is my participation trophy. It feels like a prize given for just showing up. I was forced to play this MS game. I am doing the best I can to live with it day by day. MS warriors are people who go above and beyond expectations. They are the ones profiled in newsletters or magazines who move mountains in their personal or professional lives. In my mind, warrior speaks to activity. The MS warrior wields a mighty sword and shield that twinkles in the light. The last time I checked, I was empty-handed in the semi-dark. That is not warrior-like. I cannot fully define what it means to be in the battle against multiple sclerosis, but I know it when I see it. It is not staring back at me when I stand in front of the mirror.

Surviving is fighting

Every day that a person living with MS gets going is a successful day. It means that despite the challenges of the day, we have made it to tomorrow from yesterday. I can attest to the fact that there are times that I feel the weight of this disease heavily and question what the next day will bring. Actually, we do have an idea of what the next day will bring yet we face it anyway. If that is fighting, then we are in fact in a battle and those in battle can be called a warrior. Going on the see another moment is fighting for survival.

Why resist the title?

I agree that getting from one moment to the next is fighting. I agree that this makes people living with MS a type of warrior. So why do I not feel like that? I am just getting up and putting one foot in front of the next. That does not feel warrior-like. How about you? Do you feel like a warrior? Why or why not?