Feeling worthless

I was diagnosed with the MonSter in January of 2000. I have actually had it longer…..my dr looked through my charts and saw I had symptoms since 1990 or so. I need to vent. Please bare with me. I need suggestions……..and guidance. As I am sure most of you feel, that nobody understands you, so I don’t vent to family and friends.
I woke up one morning. I had no feeling in my left leg, and fell flat on my face and could not get up. It will be 3 weeks ago tomorrow. I am a diabetic…and they ruled that out right away. They refer me to my neurologist.
So, I got discharged the following day, and was told to follow up with my dr. Right away.
So, I called on the following Monday. I already had a 6 month check up coming up on the 28th. But, I felt that I needed to be seen sooner. I left a message for them to call me.
So, the nurse calls me on Monday of this week. Says that he just wanted me to keep my appt on the 24th. I explained to her that I don’t have an appointment on the 24th, it is on the 28th. She looked and said, I was right. She would check with the dr. And see if he wants to see me sooner.
Meanwhile, I am on pins and needles. I am worried, I am scared, and wanting to, throw in the towel. So, the nurse calls me yesterday and says that he wants to just see me on the 28th. I told her that he is probably going to want an MRI …….can we do that now, and he will have the results on the 28th?? (Please remember I live over an hour away, and trying to avoid a second trip) she checked with him and said that he just wanted to wait until he sees me on the 28th.
I know that, when healthcare professionals go home, they try to forget all of their patients for the evening. I know that I am in one of the most sophisticated facilities in the Midwest. This still doesn’t make a difference if you feel like a number, instead of a human.
Any suggestions how to handle this tactfully, when I do see my neuro on the 28th?
Thanks for your time.
Feeling helpless and worthless in Indiana.

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