The holidays took its toll on me and my body

Social Anxiety!!!

Wow! I sure didn't think that having my children and grandchildren here to open presents for Christmas and having a small dinner would effect me the way it did. Because of the huge Thanksgiving dinner we had I chose to have a small Christmas dinner to avoid the hassle of overdoing it. Unfortunately with 9 people in the house I had to keep going into my bedroom and shutting the door. I live in a small house so I felt like I couldn't breathe easily. I felt crowded. Like a packed can of sardines. Oh and the noise was unbearable. Everything seemed so loud and annoying. It totally exhausted me. As much as I love my family I was so happy to have them leave.


I used to be able to sleep 8-10 hours per night. Since I have been sick I am lucky if I get 5 hours per night. I was awake a few days ago for 19 1/2 hours. I tried everything to fall asleep and nothing worked. So I figured since I had been awake that long that once I finally was able to sleep that I would sleep for quite some time. NO, I only got 4 1/2 of sleep. I am always tired and sleepy but as soon as I lay down in bed, I'm wide awake and can't sleep.

Good pain/Bad pain!!!!

Its exhausting trying to explain that my pain doesn't go away. That just some days my pain is far worse than other days. I always hear things like, "well, you were able to do this yesterday, why can't you do it today?" And after having a bad day of pain, it's hard to get people to understand that it doesn't go away the next day. Sometimes it takes several days to feel better.

Spinal tap and diagnosis

I go tomorrow for my spinal tap. Unfortunately I wont get my diagnosis until the end of February. I am a little scared and nervous. I am praying it all goes well. I am grateful that I can come here and write about my issues and my story. I am glad that I can reach out to others who share my experiences and understand first hand what I am going through. It truly helps being able to get these thoughts and feelings off of my chest.

Thank you all once again!!!

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