Never Feeling 100%

I was diagnosed with MS about 2 years ago after losing sight in my left eye (optic neuritis). Thankfully after 10 days of steroid treatment my sight returned although I can’t see colors as vividly from that eye but no real damage done.

I have not relapsed and have been taking my medication without any real side effects. For me, my issue with MS is that any symptoms I believe I have can be explained away by something else or there isn’t much that can be done.

I have felt that my stamina has slowly changed and the aches and tightness of my body have increased. How do I distinguish the cause of my fatigue from outside environmental factors such as a demanding job and finishing graduate school or is it my MS? Is the level of fatigue I feel normal or is it magnified by my MS?

I have sore and tight muscles constantly and I can’t remember when I haven’t felt this way. Is it because I don’t stretch enough? I have some tingling sensation in my arms and legs that comes and goes from time to time; is that a symptom or did my muscles “fall asleep” as they say? It’s questions like these that I struggle to answer, and I don’t know if they are caused by my MS or if it just the normal pains and struggles of everyday life.

Having MS has changed my day to day life in small ways; I have to go to sleep earlier and struggle to hear my alarm clock in the mornings, and I now have two alarms on my phone reminding me to take my medication no matter where I am or what I am doing.

I have my mobility, my speech and metal clarity. My struggles are those that I can live with, but it is mentally difficult to feel like you don’t feel physically 100 percent. Especially when these symptoms feel minuscule compared to the symptoms that others suffer from MS.

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