At 30 My Life Changed Instantly
I had my son at 28, custody battle for 3 years, and worked full time 7 days a week so my son could have a great life. Then I started having seizures, and my job was sales on the road, and I went for an MRI. My doctors said you have MS.
My MS progressed quickly
The good part was my body waited til court was over before it decided to react. My doctors pulled me from work and I was on short term and long term disability, but I figured it’s a nice vacation until they said your MS is progressing fast. So I went from working and a great life as a mom and friends to depressed, not understanding why I have this and believing I was going to die and my son will have no mom.
My 2-year-old was well-versed in MS symptoms
It took me over 6 years to accept but not fully. My son's life at 2 was witnessing seizures, MS relapses, unable to play outside in the heat, or being in the sun with and overheated. He lost every fun moment we could have together. He was very smart at an early age and knew when to call 911 and if I was having a seizure or MS relapse which is sad.
My son is the best kid and still researching ways to help me but doesn’t understand why my treatment says it’s working 100% but I’m not better but that’s where everything comes to a confused state of mind.
Pain and insomnia
Why can’t I have some of my life back where I can do things with my son. Being in bed wrapped in a heated blanket, tons of blankets, and the amount of pain and tons of insomnia. I have isolated so badly lately and could care less about doing anything at all. I don’t leave my bed nor do I leave my apartment unless my son needs to go somewhere.
Isolation helps me stay away from negative energy and people but I lost one thing that got me out of this slump which is art. Instead, I wander around forgetting what I was going to do or if my memory will come back or is this permanent. My eyes are blurry bc of 2 cataracts and it’s giving me anxiety thinking about surgery or calling my doctor about it getting worse... I tried doing hobbies but my friends - former - all used me which takes away from my son.
Declining everyday with no answers
I don’t sleep or I sleep too much. Never mind having a relationship with any man because they don’t want to deal with it.
They always say it’s too much - no kidding how do u think my poor child handles it, well because his heart is the type who is compassionate for everyone and it’s one blessing getting this because I’m more humble and a much better mother. Only thankful for that reason but I hate my dreams were crushed in a matter of seconds.
I will pass away as one that never was married or had a loved one by my side and there for my child. I pray that soon my health improves but I’m just declining every day and no answers for my son.
What do you like to do to relax?