Understanding M.E. I mean M.S.

My dealings with ms started a couple years ago and was by a mutual friend's fraudulence of it (since ms is such a case by case specific disease, she used it once confronted about not having glaucoma to reason her outrageous spending on shades4 "light sensitivity" she was having NOT TRUE) I researched it and noticed my fatigue bouts and occasional balance problems all fell in line with ms along with pins and needle sensations I would have for no apparent reason. I though nothing of it & made several excuses ie clumbsiness laziness numbness for the small attacks up until 6 months ago.

While aboard my ship 6 months ago I again had the bouts of unsteadiness and falls, a couple days before I started having a pain in my back & ribs & stretched but once I tried to cross thru the watertight door, I really couldn't lift my left leg or arm high enough. I visited my boat's corpsman and was told I probably pinched a nerve. A diagnosis I've become all too common with while in the navy. The next day I had severe trouble walking & bearing weight on my left side. A 5 min walk took me 28 mins dragging my leg being stared at horribly by the shipyard workers & some shipmates.

I left field day and went to the local navy hospital where I was REFUSED to be seen in the ER stating i'll be fine its cramps & doesn't warrant treatment on top of "your ship's corpsman should've sent you with a referral". Once @ another hospital I was taken back & when told to undress for xrays I fell on spot in front of the doctor. I was rushed for hours of MRIs which discovered the lesions and was told in front of my wife I have ms.

After a week of VERY STRONG steroids which caused me to vomit every way from sunday I slowly regained my ability to walk& avoided answering truthfully to my oldest son who asks me are you ok dad? What happened to your leg? I thought I was in the clear until my wife started pointing out to me "You keep forgetting what you're doing. You developed a stutter honey." Then bring on the migraines which have me doubled over in pain, vomiting and getting worse with lights. I often hide it from my chain of command so I wont be seen as a burden & that I am the same guy.

It has taken a great toll on me emotionally since I just want to be the same guy from before but it has changed me so much; keeping my cane near in case I need it, daily injections, lack of production fighting migraines & reaching the bar I set before my attacks. I know I have ms and I notice the changes with me now. I do whatever I can under my doctor's guidance to control it but I now tell me. In order for me to know me, I have to know ms.


NEVER going to give up

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