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I’m dating someone with MS

Hi all,

I hope everyone is doing well. I am dating a girl with MS. She was diagnosed 2 years ago. She’s an amazing girl! Smart, ambitious and quite frankly she’s extremely fit. She can wake up and go for a 10 mile run like it’s nothing.

There are times she feels extremely lethargic. The reason why I am making this post is to perhaps start a conversation regarding early detection of these periods. Honestly, I’m not even sure how to describe this, but there are times where I can smell this particular scent she gives off and sure enough those are the days where she feelings terrible.

Has anyone experienced this? I’m not trying to be too forward, but I’m also one of those people that can smell pheromones. I can smell a certain scent when she’s in the mood to do private things. But this particular scent is different. It’s almost like a scent of chemicals.

  1. +adding

    Has anyone experienced this? Is there an explanation for this? I’m whole heartedly making this post to maybe perhaps this can be used by someone to find the cure. Perhaps, if we know when the flares are happening, perhaps, XYZ dosage should be taken during those particular days.

    I love her very much and she’s so strong. I have not shared this with her because I don’t know how. We try to dismiss this as much as we can and I know she’s going to be just fine. I know it.

    1. You sound like a great boyfriend. 😀 Keep supporting her. Right now, even though it's been two years, she is still new to this. It took me several years to really feel comfortable talking about the deeper issues. Just keep letting her know that you "see her", all of her, and you are there. That means a lot.

      As for the early signs of this fatigue, I don't have an answer. I've been living with MS for 27 years and I still can't tell from any type of symptoms or anything else that I'm about to have a bad day or timeframe. I am, though, keenly aware of how much I can do without triggering a bad day. Our society likes to celebrate those who push through health challenges and keep going, but with MS we MUST listen to our bodies and not overdo it. There is a delicate balance between being active and working out and living a full life and what will push a person too far and trigger something. It takes TIME to really figure this out.

      If I overdo it, even a bit, on one day I know that the next 2-3 days are going to be hard. Sometimes the weather makes me have a bad day. I also have a time of the year that is ALWAYS more difficult, usually from January to about June. I am more fatigued, a bit weaker, and generally have to be much more careful than usual to ensure I get enough sleep and I don't do anything to trigger it getting even worse.

      I know that's not exactly what you are looking for, but hopefully it gives you some direction. Keep talking and keep asking questions and keep supporting that girl of yours!

  2. Thank you so much for reaching out here rainbow02, while you are waiting for replies from the community, let me just say that you're not being too forward at all. It takes courage in fact, to ask questions when you're not sure of the answer!

    Is she currently under the care of a doctor, perhaps a neurologist, as you mentioned she was diagnosed 2 years ago?

    I myself do not have an explanation for the olfactory sensations that you are experiencing. If you would like hopefully what would be a bit broader viewing of your question, you might want also post your question in our Have A Question section. Here is the link for that:

    Thank you SO much for reaching out and being so supportive to your girlfriend!
    All the best...Janus

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