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Not Drunk, I Have MS

How many of you have been accused of being drunk when in fact you just have mobility issues or other MS manifestations?

Last night, after the Padres game in San Diego, my friends & I were going to a bar downtown. I was stone cold sober. The bouncer stopped me and told everyone that I was too inebriated to come in!! My husband was insulted but I thought it was hilarious. I just wanted to get home, anyway. But it makes me wonder… I thought I was doing awesome and looking like one of the “normal people.” More and more, lately, people are asking me if I’m okay and treating me with kid gloves. I appreciate the concern but it makes me sad/mad. I refuse to admit that I’m any different than anyone else or the pre-diagnosis me.

How do you guys feel?

Erica

  1. When my husband and I go for walks he can tell when the heat is getting to me. I think I'm doing fine but he says my walking is off. It makes me sad too. So far it's only been him to say something to me, but I wonder if other people will eventually note it as well. I'm sorry this happened to you.

    1. Oh, the dreaded 'are you drunk?' questions and stares, (Erica)! It almost feels like a possible rite of passage for many individuals with MS. Like, you've reached another level of MS when that happens. I wish that weren't the case and I know not everyone with MS has been mistaken for being drunk and it doesn't make their MS any less serious or real.


      I like that you had a sense of humor about your incident at the Padres game, but your next question is very real and hits hard. It's hard to consider that you think you are NAILING it and doing great, despite your MS, but strangers might have a different perception of you. That can be really hard to swallow. I guess what matters is how you truly feel you are doing. Maybe you are stumbling more than you realize, but that doesn't mean you are navigating your day-to-day life just fine.


      I like that people are caring and sensitive to you, but I get that it could be really annoying if it comes off as coddling or patronizing. I think MS is pretty scary, especially to people who don't know much about the disease. They may cue off the famous people they have heard about with MS, which can be good or bad. They may think every person with MS ends up in a wheelchair (like Annette Funicello) or that people with MS can basically 'cure' their MS with sheer willpower and lifestyle changes (like Montel Williams). Neither of those examples are helpful, I think. I hope your family and friends are able to start taking their cues from you and how you are responding to your MS and any changes it may cause. And maybe you can gently remind them that your MS is YOUR MS and how you change or react to the condition is uniquely your own and they should take that in to consideration.


      All that said (whew, I am long winded today!), it's okay and normal to feel sad and it's healthy to acknowledge and process those feelings, especially in a safe place like this one or another community/support group geared towards MS or chronic illness.


      Thanks for sharing and I hope you are able to get out and enjoy more Padres games or whatever you like doing!


      Best, Erin, MultipleSclerosis.net Team Member.

      1. Yep I e been accused and now just say because I feel like it is like a drunk without the good time

        1. I know how everyone feels, if I'm tired or over done it the day before, my walking if way off the next day. No one has to tell me cause I can feel it. But when my husband notices, I would hate to feel what others may think.

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