When I'm Told, "It Could Be Worse"
Last updated: February 2023
Have you ever been told in regard to your MS, “Oh, well it could be worse!” Yeah, I know it could be worse...but it could also be better. When I get told that 'it could be worse' by someone who is saying it to be rude and not supportive, it really upsets me. Don’t compare my illness and life to someone else’s illness/life. Are there things out there worse than MS? Yes, there are. But that doesn’t make what I’m going through any better. I still have to wake up every day with this disease; I still have to fight the unknown.
There is no cure for MS, and so much is unknown
Someone once told me, “At least you don’t have cancer.” And they're right, at least I don’t have cancer...but then again, if I did have cancer and not MS, at least I would KNOW more about what’s going on, and so would the doctors. I don’t think people understand that while MS does not kill you, there is also no cure, and no one knows what causes it. So, this is something that I have to live with FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.
They're not comparable
Now don’t take what I’m saying the wrong way either. I’m not sitting here saying that MS is worse than cancer, etc. I’m saying that every illness out there is bad in its own way. There is no comparison from one to the other because if they were comparable, we would have the same prognosis, etc. But that’s not how it goes.
I didn't ask to get MS
I mean, let’s not point fingers here and play the blame game. Because I did not ASK for this. I didn’t want this. I still don’t want it, but I have it and I’m learning to live with it. Even now that it’s been years since my diagnosis, I don’t think I will ever fully come to terms with my diagnosis because I don’t know what’s coming, when it’s coming, etc. I could be in a flare tomorrow (knock on wood). That’s why I don’t think I will ever fully come to terms with it because it’s not like I know 100% that I will be the way I am now, for the rest of my life.
We have to live with MS for our entire lives
Now, in all honesty, I’m not sitting here trying to upset anyone else with any other illness, MS or anything else, I’m just venting about how I feel when what I call ‘outsiders’ give their opinion/thoughts in a very rude and disrespectful manner. Does MS shorten my life span? Most likely no, but maybe there are some of us out there with MS who wish we didn’t have to fight this battle for the rest of our lives. To have something that gives us this long to live with it, and then we pass away. Very controversial, I know, that’s why I’m not going in-depth about it. But what about those people with MS who were diagnosed a while back when no medicine available and are completely bed-ridden? Knowing they can’t come back from where they are. I wouldn’t want to live my life like that, I can tell you that much.
The impact on loved ones
I’m also not stating the above because I would be miserable living like that, but I have two young kids, a husband, a supportive family, and friends. I wouldn’t want to be like that for them. I wouldn’t want to put them through that. Am I making any sense?
So those of you who have heard, “Oh it could be worse.” If someone says that to you again, ignore him or her, or tell him or her, “Yeah it could be...but it could also be better.” Now if they’re thick-headed and don’t like to listen and they’re always ‘right’...there is no sense in arguing with a brick wall, let me just say that. ;)
Sorry for the gloomy article and venting, but I was told this not too long ago, and I just really needed to get my thoughts out there and the feedback from the MS Community, who may have been told something similar.
Anyways! I hope everyone is well and thanks for reading!
What does advocacy mean to you as someone living with multiple sclerosis? Please select all that apply: