How involved do you want your partner to be?

I understand your quandary. I'm currently there myself, a little earlier in the process. I'm still with my original neurologist (this time around), and waiting for my spinal MRIs in October. And the question has plagued me.

I don't have a supportive family member in my corner (little sis is on the other side of the country), but I do have people who care.

My thoughts at this time... I will see the MRI results on my patient portal before I see my neurologist. So I can discuss with my hubby before I get the follow up appointment. And depending on the results, I will very likely go to my first appointment alone. My reasoning? I want to have the time and space to process the information presented first. I'll likely record the appointment so we can play it back later, but I'm a giver. So if he's there with me, I'll be more concerned about his emotional response than me processing my own.

BUT I do plan to have a discussion with him first so I know his opinion. Does he want to be included in that initial appointment? Will he feel excluded or insignificant if I go alone? And I'll likely tell him my reasoning for wanting to go alone.

I am wishing you the very best, and sending support whatever you choose.

💜💜

Hi, !

I think provided some great insight. We tend to encourage members to take along a supportive person to appointments, but only if you think it will help you. Sometimes, having another person there to listen and even write things down can help you process the information discussed after the appointment. It can also help a supportive person to start to grasp your diagnosis and how to help.

But, again, you have to do what works for you.

And, since you are the one with the diagnosis, this is no time for hurt feelings. If you choose to take your sibling, your partner should not be offended. But, that also should not mean that your sibling is the "go-to" person that is designated as your support person, if that makes sense. I kind of sound like I am slamming your partner, but that is not my intent. It's just that you are the most important person in this scenario and you are allowed to act accordingly.

And, if you want to keep things between you and your doctor, that's a great option, too. You might feel like you can ask more tough, nitty gritty questions if you don't have to worry about scaring your partner or sibling.

I feel like gave you a more concise, less rambling answer, so my apologies for that!

In the end, you do what you think is best for you.

Best, Erin, Team Member.

Hi Nobody!

I would take your husband to as many appointments as you can. My husband goes with me to all of my appointments. He has a pretty good grasp on what MS is doing to me. I am used to being very independent and he reminds me I need to rest or I will pay for it the next day. Having him at my appointments also helps me remember what the Dr says. I think it is important to have your spouse fully involved. They are going to be the ones to help you get through this crazy disease.

Hi there are many videos about MS in you tube from my neurologist Aaron Boster. You can find answers for almost anything related to MS including how to involve your friends and family. He knows so much!