Tell us about your symptoms and treatment experience. Take our survey here.

caret icon Back to all discussions

Unsolicited Advice

"You should try bee therapy or acupuncture."

"You should just smile more."

"We're never given more than we can handle."

"You're really tired? I get that way too. You should try to sleep more."

Looking for others who understand that all advice is not good advice? We get it! We know that many people have the best intentions when it comes to handing out advice or anecdotes. Many just want to offer help, kindness, or just try to uplift those with MS.

Sometimes, these well-intentioned pieces of advice fall flat and become unhelpful or even hurtful.

What's been a piece of unsolicited advice about MS that you've received?

  1. You need to keep working as long as you can, until you need a wheel chair!!

    1. Wow, . That's scary that he even tried to persuade you to take it. I wonder how many people he has already convinced that it is safe and effective and how they are doing. Good riddance to that person. Wishing you the best. - Lori (Team Member)

    2. oh that is the worst I have heard!!! So sorry…no one’s MS is the same!

  2. It's good they caught it while you were so young! This is the most ignorant and insensitive thing anyone can say!! Just Stupid! Not just MS patients, but anyone with a chronic illness without a cure. I got very angry with a family member who said something along the lines of "you're lucky because you're young."
    MS is a progressive disease. They could find a cure tomorrow, and not reverse the damage that has already been done! I am not lucky. Some may think, I'd have forever to improve. No! I have had my whole life to get worse.

    1. Wow. That is an incredibly rude and ignorant thing to say, . I wish you didn't have to contend with that. Gentle hugs. - Lori (Team Member)

  3. I love the just smile more! In recent years, they proved resting bitch face is a real thing. I tell folks I'm not gonna fake a smile. It'll contribute to future wrinkles.

    1. I have days like that.😇


    2. ugh that and "just take a nap", right that'll fix the autoimmune disorde

  4. BE HAPPY IT COULD BE WORSE!!!!!


    or ....


    My _________ has MS. S/he is still able to __________, often before we even get up! I think it really shows the power of positive thinking! S/he is an amazing _____________ and a real inspiration to me! You should meet them!



    LOL

    1. Ha! Subnormal, great ideas about the drink names and music!! And you are right about the time limitations of the event!! And goodness knows that this website does a great job at providing the right type of "space" where MS patients can share with each other without judgment!!! The only time I've experienced this type of "space" in real life to learn from and share with other MS patients was at one infusion location (https://multiplesclerosis.net/living-with-ms/crap-gap#comment-458487). I really do miss the camaraderie of my Tysabri infusion group - no pressure and every freedom to share and learn.

    2. 🧡😅 so true!!

Please read our rules before posting.