how to help someone who has MS?
hi! i dont have MS, but my girlfriend does, and im wondering if anyone has good advice for how i can help her in our everyday lives? she has really bad muscle spasms from time to time, and it gets worse in the cold. she also has a lot of moments of "weird" feelings that she describes like lethargy and her body feeling slow. i would love any advice i can get from anyone who may have some tips! i really want to help her out with this as much as i can.
I don't know if I can offer much help, but I want to say I commend you.
I'm experiencing many symptoms of MS but am not diagnosed still. So there's my disclaimer. And I am a ferociously independent person, I tend to get really irritated when people step in to help me, even when I clearly need an assist. I've needed to take a couple of steps back over the last year to reframe my thoughts and emotions, and to accept help without feeling slighted.
I have been with my partner for 11 years now, we've been married for just over a year. And he is a very giving, compassionate person who always steps up and wants to make things easier, fix things, wants to make things better. It's one of the traits I love, but I also found that I needed to open communication even more over the last year to set some boundaries. Because sometimes I truly need help, but so many other times I want to continue even when it's hard.
So, my best recommendation is to offer that open communication to your girlfriend. To let her decide when and how she needs help. And let her know that you have her back and will step up or step in when she wants or needs. I came up with a 'safety phrase' for when things are too much and I can't ask for what I need. I tell my husband that I need some water. This way, I can tell him I'm struggling and to take the lead... without telling the other people around us. And it's generalized into our regular lives because it's easy, and I don't have to push through the fog to say it.
I'm wishing the best for you and your girlfriend. 💜💜
