Your Shortcomings Can Be Your Superpowers
Warning: This may be a trigger post for some.
Negativity. Why it is so popular, I will never understand. I used to be a negative Nancy myself, so I do understand how it can swallow you whole. Of course, I’m human and still have negative thoughts, so I get it. I really do. Sometimes life is the pits, and life with MS can feel like an extra ton of negativity on your back. The extra negativity can unleash the Hulk in all of us from time to time. BUT, one thing I will never understand is why people choose to stay stuck there. I’ve found surrounding MS, and even in MS communities, negativity has run rampant. There’s negativity from others towards us, and then there’s the negativity that some after diagnosis can’t ever shake, and then unknowingly spew that onto others. It honestly saddens me on both ends. To live life only seeing negative aspects of every situation and to constantly be negative towards others makes life seem so hopeless.
The world can already be cruel
I for one, can’t let negativity get me down. I’ll be honest, from time to time it does, and I’m sad to say I sometimes allow it to affect me. However, I refuse to let other people’s miserable demeanors and outlooks shed any light on my views. Yep, MS stinks. It’s taken a huge toll on my life, and I’ve faced my demons because of it. I have determined though, after many years of dealing with this subject, that it doesn’t do any of us one bit of good. Not even a little bit. We are not stuck with negative mind-sets. In my opinion, bettering ourselves should always be a priority, and sometimes I think people forget that, including myself. This world can already be so harsh and cruel, what good does it do to add to that?
Words have power
Words are incredibly powerful and they have so much impact. I like to remind myself; words have power to heal, power to destroy and power to change the world. Are the words I’m writing or saying helping someone or hurting someone? I love writing and hope to uplift others by the things I say, but sometimes that comes with a lot of backlash. Negative people tend to hate positivity. And, I’ve come to the conclusion that all I can do is wish them the best. From my own experience with my negativity in the past, and my positivity today, I choose positivity daily, hands down.
Compassion towards others that are hurting
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t at all dislike negative people. I have so much compassion towards others that are hurting and down, because I've been there. What I dislike is people that project their personal negativity onto others to try and break their spirits. I think a sad part of today’s society is people become so bitter and negative because they forget to have empathy and compassion for others. They forget that others are facing their own battles too. So many times we lash out at people when we have no idea that their brother just died, or they’re contemplating suicide later that day. What we forget to stop and think is that our negativity could be what breaks someone, and for me, that’s a huge reason to stop and think before I speak or write something online. Negativity is a breeding ground for negative outcomes.
Facing my demons
I like to think that my shortcomings in being negative with MS early on has now become a kind of superpower. I’ve always been one to try and use the negativity I had in my past to help others now. I don’t wish this disease and it’s life changes on anyone. But, I’m also not going to give it the power of ruining my life. I just can’t. I used to lack the empathy and compassion I have now, because I was so angry. I didn’t care about what others were going through, because I was so consumed with myself. I think we all go through those moments. What I realized though, is that how I was acting was not benefiting anyone, not even myself. It hurt me more to be negative and wallow in the hard things life had given me, than to face them. Once you face those demons though, life really can be ok. In fact, it can be more than ok, it can be great!
Perspective
It’s all in your perspective. My superpower came in seeing that negativity didn’t have to be a part of my life. When I came to that huge realization, it not only helped me feel better, but I was able to use my personal positivity to be able to see when others were low and needed to be lifted up by a kind word or gesture. Reach out, join a community and surround yourself with others who have been in the same boat. You're not alone. A positive life with sincere happiness is just around the corner, but to achieve it, you have to surround yourself with it. I’m not saying to go around and act like everything is butterflies and unicorns, because I know it’s not, but there's such a difference in having negative moments and being stuck with a negative life. I just hope we can all (including myself) remember to stop and think before we speak. To let our words uplift someone and not tear them down. We all have to help each other, and be there to carry each other through the highest of highs and lowest of lows.
Reaching out
I don’t say any of these things because I’m the perfect positive person. I’m nowhere near that, but I would like to be. I strive to be that. I’m just disheartened by the negativity I see surrounding us, and seeing how it can truly hurt someone. Don’t let your thoughts and words hurt yourself and others. Allow your shortcomings to become your superpower.
And if negativity has gotten you to a point where you don't think you can go on, I urge you to talk to someone. There are so many people out there willing to help, and just to listen. Sometimes simply knowing someone is there or that someone understands makes all the difference in the world.
XOXO,
Calie
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